Today I did a 7 hour fast--from 8am until 3pm. It was kinda on a whim...some ladies through MySpace, the Elect Ladies, put out a call yesterday for sistahs to come together and fast for healing. I had been thinking of doing a fast for awhile now since it's been over a year since the last time.

This morning when I began my fast I went in believing that I was seeking guidance and strength during this time of transition in my life. My last day of work will be this Friday and to date I don't have another job lined up. I'm not in panic mode, but it doesn't hurt to send some prayers up before it gets to that level, right? I thought I was seeking God today for peace of mind, but as the day progressed I realized my real concern isn't my job (or lack thereof)--it's relationships.

I'm somewhat dating this new guy and things began really well, but as I had time to think today with a clear mind I know that things are quickly going down a path they don't really need to go down. I just came out of relationship a little over a month ago. In short, I KNOW BETTER. So many things were revealed to me today in talking with myself...oh, and listening to the song "Trizonna" on Trizonna McClendon's CD (definitely pick it up if you don't have it! it's titled "Overtones & Innuendos"). In my silence today I was really able to play back our conversations and truly hear what's been said to me..truly hear what my heart has to say.

Typically, I'm so quick to condemn myself for acting foolishly when "I know better," but today I am rejoicing! I'm happy at the fact that I am able to read my emotions much more quickly now. I'm happy that even when I "fall off" my recovery time of getting myself back on track is a lot shorter these days. I'm happy that I've reached a place where I love myself enough to value what I really feel. I know I don't need to repeat the same bad habits. Each day is a new day; each moment is a new moment. I'm thankful.

I don't desire to rush into anything too soon or settle for what I don't really want. Me and "Mr. Man" definitely have some talking to do tonight. I'm back on purpose and hopefully he can flow with that.

Now, I need to go find food b/c a sistah is starving!