I struggle today to make peace with things happening around me - things that I have no control over, wouldn't want to have the power to control, but yet, these things are still the source of my lament today.

We all have had to take our time to come to grips with the sudden death of Michael Jackson. Most of us remember the bright eyed innocent wonder with the wide brimmed purple hat aced/deuced to one side mesmerizing us with his vocals on the Ed Sullivan Show back in the 70's. Some of us hold fondly to the memories of him amazing us by moon-walking into his destiny in 1995. Whatever your memory of him is, hold to the positive and not the negatives that will surely surface - because as we know every fool on the planet has something to say about someone who's dead and can no longer defend himself.

On a personal note, the cherry on the pie of my week started the day before father's day when I was awakened by my husband who said "You need to get up and get dressed, Steve had a heart attack and is on his way to the hospital" (Steve is about 22 years older than me and is one of the best friends I ever had). So, I sprung out the bed, set a world record for the "Fastest Female to get Cleaned up and Dressed" and hurried across town to the hospital.

As the days went on, I sat with his wife of 40 years, and watched his son (36) and daughter (38) struggle with the closure that was sure to come. On Tuesday, I was present when the neurologist delivered bad news to the family - news that Steve's daughter would not allow herself to accept. Wednesday, I was their when they started dialysis because his kidneys were shutting down. Thursday, my husband and I watched him have electronic seizures and the brain monitors showed how his brain activity was rapidly decreasing. So, I said my goodbyes, thanked him for his unfailing friendship and began to ask myself and my husband, "What am I going to do without Steve?". On the way home from the hospital, it was announced that Michael Jackson died......WHAT?? Saturday, Steve's wife, children, and our pastor (who was a long-time friend) met with his team of doctors so they could confirm everything that we already knew, He was gone and the only thing keeping him alive was the respirator. Yesterday, I took my kids to see "Transformers" - which was a welcomed break from it all............I had the strangest revelation during that movie and it was confirmed about 45 minutes later that my beloved friend, confidant, the consumate joker, the kindest man I had ever known was GONE.

Perhaps the most ironic thing is, both Steve and Michael died of the same thing. They both had massive heart attacks (brought on by totally different things, of course). The big difference was, Steve was at home with his wife when it happened and Michael was 'presumed' to be alone at the time his hit. Nevertheless, another good person is gone and I have 1,000 funny stories about him and memories that I will keep with me forever.

Michael: Hopefully the next life with provide you with more peace than this one did.
Steve: Hopefully you will have as much fun in the next life as you did in this one.

You have both earned your rest!!

Peace!!