I often feel like I have an invisible wall around myself, a shield that keeps me from the barbs that can be thrown at you from the various encounters I face every day. I suppose a good amount of shielding is a little necessary--it's important to guard our hearts and not let other people's issues become ours. At the same time, though, I feel I do this a little bit too well...I don't always feel as though I am living as authentically or vulnerably as I could be with those in my circle.


I saw a friend on the train last week and we had the best conversation we ever had. We talked about our issues and our hopes and our fears...and in such a public space as the Broad Street Line made the experience that much more liberating. After our conversation, I felt really elated and wished that I could have even more conversations with my friends like this...that I could just break down the walls and truly let people in...not worrying about how I look or what people will think.


As I thought about the experience later on in the day, I began to feel acceptance come into my heart. I began to accept that I have these walls instead of constantly feeling frustrated about them. To my surprise, that acceptance of something I so want to remove in my life made it altogether easier to handle it. I realized that the reason I put up walls is because I don't accept myself. The more I accept myself, the more I can open myself to others and bring feelings of acceptance to them.