have been rolling around in my psyche for a month or so this idea of the Afrikan wombman, the aboriginal wombman, the creatrix of life & the wombniverse that sustains us all as being Too Much
It is an image we lil brown gurls are raised with, the domineering, overbearing, loud, big dark woman...we are constantly told don't be like Her and so we work hard to tuck away any parts of ourselves that look, sound or act like Her...we pretend not to see our own darkness, we squeeze ourselves & suck in reeally hard to negate our bigness, we torture ourselves over any situation in which we were loud, or asked for what we wanted or demanded anything, anything at all
and one day, we burst wide open...and find that all of our soft, tender juicy parts are Her...that our creativity, our love, our joy, our pain and OUR PLEASURE are Her and on that day we...dance, we shout, we sing, we have a Nervous Breakdown, a psychotic episode, on that day WE HOLLER!
I have accepted that I am TOO MUCH...
I AM
I am too much for any man who looks at me
has a conversation with me
has been made love to by me
has courted me
has lived with me AND