Well so far my experience here in New York has been profoundly beautiful, gut wrenching, and everything in between. I'm getting settled into my spot. I assembled my Oshun altar, and that's a calming presence in my room. This transition has not been easy, so I've been focusing a lot of my energy there. What I know is that I truly love this place. With each passing day, I understand more and more why I was called here. I have some important work to do artistically, mentally, and spiritually. I've spent a good chunk of my adult life looking outside of myself for answers, and looking to others to define who I was. It's time to cultivate my own garden.
But the transition is by no means easy. New York is definitely more expensive, and the competition for jobs is much greater. I apply for things every day, but I panic a little, because I have two months I can sustain myself before I would have to leave. I don't want to do that, because things are very positive for me here, and I'd hate to throw in the towel before I even got started! But I'm determined, so I'm trying to just breathe, pray, and be patient.
Monday of this week I went to see Jill Scott in the park in Brooklyn (were there any ymibers there? I could just FEEL you), and I was struck by all the beautiful Black folks there! I mean just so many glowing, radiant, lovely...I was just staring, lol. And everyone was so nice! My roommate and I met some folks in line that we hung out with the rest of the night. Seeing Jill Scott there under the stars was just amazing. We were all about to leave after what we thought was her encore, and she came back out and said, "Hey! Where are you going?" She asked if there were any artists in the house, and then of course everybody RAN back to their seats waving and shouting. She spoke about what a privilege artistic inspiration is, and how delicate those moments of inspiration are, which is why you must be "obedient to your gift." That phrase has been on repeat in my head ever since. I had never thought of it that way. What comes through us is a blessing, and we honor that blessing by seeing it through. Jill said that means when inspiration hits you in the middle of the night and you'd rather roll over and go back to sleep, you get up and follow your vision. Then she sang a song that had come to her in just that way, at 3am. As she sang, she began to cry, and so did I. It was a powerful song, it was like the Creator speaking to her and through her, telling her she was a being full of light. And as she sang these words, suddenly it was not just Jill Scott on the stage, on her face. I was looking at an ancestor, someone from generations past sending love power through her. It was profound. Actually, my whole experience in Brooklyn was profound, and I can't wait to go back. My mate and I are even talking about moving there when he joins me in a few months.
And then there's the mate, Codi is his name. Our connection and our commitment to one another seems to deepen with each passing day. We now know that what we have is too special to be careless with. We're learning how to really take care of each other. This weekend, I flew back home to pack and ship some artwork, and I stayed with him at his family's house. When the cab dropped me off, the man at the door had sad eyes and the beginnings of a six pack (he's been working out a lot since I've been gone). We went inside and I sat down with him, concerned. There was no food in the house, and although he was muscular he didn't look...healthy. I asked him what the last green thing was that he ate. He said broccoli a couple days ago. He mostly ate steaks or pork chops, with frozen mixed vegetables, and everyone in the house was eating Popeye's chicken or nothing at all. Some of the progress we'd made had clearly been undone, and that's why he looked like he did. Almost every day we lived together, I made big green salads, strained different herbal teas that would be beneficial for him, I even had him doing steams with lavender, eucalyptus and mint to help his chronic sinus problem. Now here he was, no veggies and sticking the bottle of eucalyptus oil in his nose to sniff. It was a sad sight. I just held him. He said he was having a hard time there, and he was ready to join me sooner than later. So we're both going to do what it takes to make that happen. He's spoken to his boss about transferring, and I'm looking at different areas to move to. Does anyone know of a particular area of Brooklyn we should look into?
But things here are fine, I'm just working on getting the ball rolling, which I knew would take some time. I put my energy into my sketchbook, and looking into different art opportunities, of which there are many. Aside from that, I'm just gonna put it out there: I'm kind of lonely. I don't really know anyone here, and I don't have that network of sisterfriends right down the street like I did in CA. If anybody in the area knows of something fun to check out, or would like to have tea or something, hit me up :)